Best Amusing Spaceballs Quotes

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Here are the most amusing quotes of spaceballs film that will help you to remove your boring time and get happiness all the day. I hope you will enjoy those quotes.

Spaceballs is an American satirical comic science fiction film. The film written by Mel Brooks, Ronny Graham and Thomas Meehan. Spaceballs film produced and directed by Mel Brooks. Starring by Mel Brooks, John Candy, Rick Moranis, Bill Pullman, Daphne Zuniga, Dick Van Patten, George Wyner and Joan Rivers.

The film makes based on a science fiction like ‘King Roland is the king of a peaceful planet Druidia, which get threat from President Skroob and then a star pilot and his sidekick must come to the rescue of a Princess and save the galaxy from a ruthless race of beings known as Spaceballs’.

The film first release on June 24, 1987 and it has since become a cult classic and one of Brooks’s most popular films. In September 2008 Spaceballs was developed into an animated television show which debuted as Spaceballs: The Animated Series on G4 (US) and Super Channel (Canada).


“So, Lone Starr, now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb.” – Dark Helmet

“What’s the matter, Colonel Sandurz? Chicken?” – Dark Helmet

“I am your father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate.” – Dark Helmet

“It’s either that 4th of July or someone’s trying to kill us!” – Dot Matrix

“Sandurz, Sandurz! You got to help me! I don’t know what to do. I can’t make decisions! I’m a president!” – President Skroob

“On this ship, you are to refer to me as “idiot,” not “you captain”! I mean – you know what I mean! Lone Starr: Just what we need… a Druish Princess!” – Lone Starr

“Look your highness, it’s not that we’re afraid, far from it. It’s just that we’ve got this thing about death; it’s not us.” – Barf

“Please bring her back safely! [pause] And if it’s at all possible, try to save the car.”– King Roland

“It’s my industrial-strength hair-dryer, and I can’t live without it!” – Princess Vespa

“I’m the Bearded Lady. Who are you, one of the freaks?” – Bearded Lady

“Charlene, Marlene: Hello, President Skroob.” – Dark Helmet

“[to Marlene] Hello, Charlene.” – President Skroob

“Chew your gum. President Skroob: [enters after the interrogation of King Roland] Well? Did it work? Where’s the king?” – President Skroob

“It worked, sir. We have the combination.” – Dark Helmet

“Great. Now we can take every last breath of fresh air from planet Druidia. What’s the combination?” – President Skroob

“1 2 3 4 5.” – Dark Helmet

“1 2 3 4 5? That’s amazing! I’ve got the same combination on my luggage! Prepare Spaceball 1 for immediate departure!” – President Skroob

“Yes, sir!” – Dark Helmet

“And change the combination on my luggage! Lone Starr: Who hasn’t heard of Yogurt!” – President Skroob

“Yogurt the Wise!” – Princess Vespa

“Yogurt the All-Powerful!” –  Dot Matrix

“Yogurt the Magnificent!” – Barf:

“Please, please, don’t make a fuss. I’m just plain Yogurt. Barf: [reacting to the guards being shot by Princess Vespa] holy shit!” – Yogurt

“How was that?” – Princess Vespa

“Not bad.” – Lone Starr

“Not bad… for a girl.” – Barf

“Hey that was pretty good for RAMBO! Dark Helmet: We were told to comb the desert so we’re combing it.” – Dot Matrix

“Found anything yet?” – Dark Helmet

“Nothing sir! [to two more white henchmen with a giant comb]” – Henchmen

“How about you?” – Dark Helmet

“Not a thing sir! [to two black henchmen with a giant pick]” – Henchmen

“What about you guys?” – Dark Helmet

“Man, we ain’t found shit! Dark Helmet: [breathes heavily, Darth Vader-style] I can’t breathe in this thing! Captain of the Guard: You idiots! These are not them! You’ve captured their stunt doubles!” – Henchmen

“Careful you idiot! I said across her nose, not up it!” – Dark Helmet

“Sorry sir! I’m doing my best!” – Laser Gunner

“Who made that man a gunner?” – Dark Helmet

“I did sir. He’s my cousin.” – Major Asshole

“Who is he?” – Dark Helmet

“He’s an asshole sir.” – Colonel Sandurz

“I know that! What’s his name?” – Dark Helmet

“That is his name sir. Asshole, Major Asshole!” – Colonel Sandurz

“And his cousin?” – Dark Helmet

“He’s an asshole too sir. Gunner’s mate First Class Philip Asshole!” –Colonel Sandurz

“How many as holes do we have on this ship, anyway? [Entire bridge crew stands up and raises a hand]” – Dark Helmet

“I knew it. I’m surrounded by assholes! [Dark Helmet pulls his face shield down]” – Dark Helmet

“Keep firing, assholes! Dark Helmet: You have the ring, and I see your Schwartz is as big as mine. Let’s see how well you handle it.” – Dark Helmet

“So, Lone Star, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.” – Dark Helmet

“What the Hell am I looking’ at? When does this happen in the movie?” – Dark Helmet

“Radar about to be “jammed.” – Barf

“I’ll bet she gives great helmet.” – Dark Helmet

“May The Schwartz be with you.” – Yogurt

“Nah, he got the upside, I got the downside. See there’s two sides to every Schwartz.” – Dark Helmet

“Knock on my door! Knock next time!” – Dark Helmet

“How many assholes do we have on this ship, anyway?” – Dark Helmet

“Well, I hope it’s a long ceremony, cause it’s gonna be a short honeymoon.” – Dark Helmet

“You have the ring. And I see that your Schwartz is as big as mine. Now, let’s see how well you handle it.” – Dark Helmet

“The ship is too big. If I walk, the movie will be over.” – President Skroob

“Out of order? f*ck! Even in the future nothing works!” – Dark Helmet


“No you fool, we’re following orders. We were told to comb the desert so we’re combing it.” – Dark Helmet

“Oh my gosh. It’s not just a spaceship. It’s a transformer.” – Barf

“Why are we always “preparing”? Just go.” – Dark Helmet

“Absolutely nothing! Which is what you are about to become.” – Dark Helmet

“Of course you do. Dronish princesses are often attracted to money, and power, and I have BOTH, and you know it!” – Dark Helmet

“Now you see that evil will always triumph, because good is dumb.” – Dark Helmet

“My hair… You shot my hair!!! YOU BASTARDS” – Princess

“I can’t breathe in this thing!” – Dark Helmet

“What are those thing coming out of her nose?’ ‘Spaceballs!’ ‘Oh sh*t, there goes the planet.” – Dark Helmet

“No, no, no. Go past this. Pass this part. In fact, never play this again.” – Dark Helmet

“Ooh! Those flashing eyes, those pouting lips. You know something princess? You are UGLY when you’re angry.” – Lone Starr

“I’m a Mawg. Half-man, half-dog. I’m my own best friend.” – Barf

“What’s a-matter, Colonel Sanders? CHICKEN?” – Dark Helmet

“What the hell am I looking at? When does this happen in the movie?” – Dark Helmet

“There’s only one man who would dare give me the raspberry…Lone Starr!” – Dark Helmet

“Those flashing eyes. Those flushed cheeks. Those trembling lips. You know something princess, “you are ugly when you’re angry.” – Lone Starr

“No, it’s not what you think. It’s much, much worse!” – Dark Helmet

“The way he runs things it won’t last a hundred.” – Dark Helmet

“What’s the matter with this thing, what’s all that churning and bubbling, you call that radar screen?” – Dark Helmet

“Ah, planet Druidia. And under that air shield, ten thousand years of fresh air. We must get through that air shield!” – Dark Helmet

“I know we need the money, but…” – Barf

“The minute we move in their going to spot us on their radar.” – Dark Helmet

“We’re done with you. Go back to the golf course and work on your puts.” – Dark Helmet

“Oh! That’s gonna leave a mark.” – Barf

“Yes, we’re gonna have to go right to…ludicrous speed!” – Dark Helmet

“WHAT? You went over my helmet?” – Dark Helmet

“I bet she gives great helmet.” – Dark Helmet

“So, Lord Helmet, at last we meet again for the first time for the last time.” – Lone Starr

“So the combination is… one, two, three, four, five? That’s the stupidest combination I’ve ever heard in my life! That’s the kind of thing an idiot would have on his luggage!” – Dark Helmet

“So, Princess Vespa, at last I have you in my clutches, to have my way with you, the way I want to.” – Dark Helmet

“No, no, no, light speed is too slow!” – Dark Helmet

“Say goodbye to your two best friends- and I don’t mean your pals in the Winnebago!” – Dark Helmet

“My brains are going into my feet!” – Dark Helmet

“I’ll have the cleavage; I mean the special.” – Barf

“And what have we got on this thing, a *Cuisinart*?” – Dark Helmet

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